Visual Metaphor

Closing Time

2005-07-14T10:54:00.000-04:00

Yup..its that time already. This blog is now out of service...and has moved to visualmetaphor.com

Pretty much, you just have to not type the .blogspot ..so its actually easier :)

Ill leave this up, so it can act as an "archive"

See u at VM..

Convergence

2005-07-05T11:51:00.000-04:00

These days everybody is talking about how handheld gadgets are engaged in sometimes blissful and other times hellish marriages which produce interesting offsprings.

People usually have their own ideas...and some have come to the market like the camera phone, the all-in-one PDA that does everything except save your soul from God's wrath. And at times people just ask for fun...what if we merged an iPod with a police radar detector?, what if my pacemaker could detect other people with pacemakers and we could take over the world?, let's take the psp (which is pretty awesome btw) and attach a wireless link to your car's steering wheel+webcam on dashboard...so now you can actually drive your car locked in the trunk.

I think there will be a natural balance achieved eventually. People will reject the superflous and accept the useful (aren't i so trustworthy in humankind's ability to select "right"...obviously they'll do the opposite of what i'm saying). But let's say people weren't dumb, then we'd resort to using a few devices that had multi-tasking abilities and other dedicated features. Most people would like to have a dedicated camera, but there are plenty which would like low quality quikie fotos. Others wouldn't mind having a psp like all-in-one media devices, but would abhor having it function as a cell phone..but would love if it could access the internet and their email. But what is this natural balance i speak of? I'm mainly referring to our ability to carry things with us. It is directly proportional to the number of pockets we have..and well..our posture. Cause carrying tons of accessories hurts our already bad backs in this sit-all-day-infront-of-computer age. We need to consider that we (from hence forth, i am refering to guys, since girls have the superpower of carrying a purse ala Batman's belt (yes, im opening up another thought bubble inside the first one. Just had a thought. Maybe Batman's belt is a Freudian-ish impulse of men due to their neglected purse-carrying opportunity in society)) usually carry a wallet and a set of keys and a cell phone.

The cell phone has been regulated to our belt clip. And unless its winter, the other two pockets are occupied. I know there are usually 4 pockets in total. But using the back pockets for anything is just insanely useless unless your walking. Who wants to sit on their wallet especially with the explosion in plastic cards (credit, debit and points) and ID's and gym memberships. At least back in the day they could use the backpocket, since all they had was paper. Nowadays, the wallet's also merging with coin holders, business card holders, pen holders etc.

My camera's case (a sony dsc-w1) can actually be attached to my belt..and ive done it a few times without much discomfort. Now, if i were to get a music player..where would it go? The shuffle is good for people with already too much..since its a lanyard that can be attached around your neck (human body realestate is a burgeoning market these days). But ofcourse, most mp3 players come with belt clips as well. So now that would be 3 things around my belt, along with my ever expanding waist. I don't know if Timmy can hold on (where Timmy = personified belt).

Yes, why not just change the clothes...adapt them to technology? Well, as some of you know, this has been tried for quite some time..and hasn't caught on. These so called "tech-clothes"..with extra pockets all along your pant legs..your arms. Not only is it the highest sign of geek-dom, but it won't work until you flood the market with just these clothes. If u faced with normal clothes..and then...uber-geek clothes with bad design. I think i know which one you'll choose. And even if u buy one pair, that means that if u need to carry ur stuff around, u can only wear that one pair..and all ur other clothes are useless.

I think the solution to all of this, is just to replace our bones with all these gadgets and link it to the brain. Instant gratification to infinity.

What inspired this post: Nokia thinks one isn't enough.

Quote of the Day and Iqbal

2005-07-04T10:04:00.000-04:00

"We are alone, absolutely alone on this chance planet: and, amid all the forms of life that surround us, not one, excepting the dog, has made an alliance with us."
- Maurice Maeterlinck

....'Tis sad indeed

In other Fahd news..

I'm reading Allama Iqbal's Reconstruction of Religious Thought in Islam [link to complete text online]. I must say its one of the most intellectually intense books I have read, along with Douglas R. Hofstadter Godel Escher Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid. Iqbal is tying religious concepts and Quran with theoretical physics, philosophy and psychology. When I get the time, I'll post some interesting quote's from his work.

the fat lady comes onto the stage..

2005-06-29T23:39:00.000-04:00

so i've been a little busy recently..so i'll ramble stuff that has happened: mom/sis come from abroad, company boat cruise along lakeshore, AI club meeting, two nights of basketball, two nights of dinner parties, working on two websites at the same time...and guitar classes got cancelled.

the days of this blog are numbered (reminds me of a quote i read today: the days of digital watches are numbered..yuk yuk)...but only to reappear on my own website, with more organized structure and rants. I'm aiming for a portal where I can have all my favorite news and sites readily available..as well as an e-commerce thing with Amazon. Just have to figure out how the tax thingy works..altho i dont think i have to worry about it since im a student making a small amount of money.

Now wouldn't this make an awesome birthday present?

2005-06-27T09:27:00.000-04:00

Penguin Classics Complete Collection

wise words..funny man

2005-06-21T09:13:00.000-04:00

More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?
I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.
His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.

Woody Allen

How to achieve World Peace:

2005-06-15T22:04:00.000-04:00

Tanzania and Germany

2005-06-14T09:47:00.000-04:00

A couple of my classmates have some awesome co-op placements abroad. They have their own blogs going detailing their adventures and work. Really nice pictures as well.

Steve got a placement thru the Waterloo chapter of Engineers Without Borders and is volunteering in Tanzania on some really interesting projects.

Jeff is working at IBM Germany and seems to be having loads of fun touring Europe (oh so lucky) and trying to decipher German groceries.

It's painful watching myself

2005-06-12T19:56:00.000-04:00

This is me performing Un Dia De Noviembre by Leo Brouwer. Other than a few squeeks and not so clean playing, I actually froze for a bit and skipped out on about a 45 seconds more of playing to avoid the embarassement of making more mistakes. Ofcourse, since no one in the audience would've heard this, I'm sure no one noticed me skipping a section.

I wasn't happy after this, I knew I could've played it better and complete. GAH!! Nevertheless, only my 2nd real performance infront of an audience.

So i did end up dancing, but only cause I felt like it. That's how I like it..no one forcing me..and alot of people on the dance floor.

Hula Gula

2005-06-10T18:19:00.000-04:00

Well, tomorrow is a family friend's engagement party and as per tradition in our circle of friends...the kids (primarily guys) usually do something (read: provide entertainment for old aunties and uncles ..and ofcourse bridge/groom). Its known in pakistani as hula gula. My friends and brother are quite good at doing this; and i am obviously quite out of the loop (i suppose i dont have a hula gula gene). Basically, for those of you who don't know, it's like watching 10 monkeys in a cage. Very fascinating and entertaining for 4 hours, especially if you have a buffet and dessert in between. My bro n friends are all quite talented ... they sing, dance (bhangra ofcourse..and some hip hop), play guitar and dhol (the drum with the crooked stick)..and once in a while...impromptu acting. The aunties love it, especially. There are always a few guys that aren't extroverted enough to let down their gaurd and jump around while screaming infront of 50 year old ladies and gents, including me. And its SOOooooo weird when u think about it. Uncles, aunties and the girls..sitting around on tables in the banquet hall...staring. In the middle, a bunch of guys howling and trying to fix light bulbs to loud punjabi beats. See...if everyone was dancing..it would be less weird. Altho i have been forced to join the group once in a while..where i lose the shyness and try my best to not do anything to attract attention to me on the dance floor. The problem being..since i dont go on that often..now when or if i DO go..i get the feeling that ppl are looking at me..just cause it is a novelty! But maybe the world just doesn't revolve (damn..another word like involve..these damn vovle/volve words!) around me. So tomorrow will be the same. I will be expected to dance, otherwise it will be an insult to the groom. Altho i do not intend to insult them by showing my visually unappealing moves..but i guess its the thought-of-the-action that counts.

And then..u have the moments when
a) uncles think they are the next Muhammad Rafi
b) uncles think that their latifays can't be matched, even by Seinfeld (well, maybe they would be funny if i understood them....hm..ok no...they still wont be)
b) they feel the need to express the need for all of us to return to our religion, Islam...obviously...looking straight at the 15-25 age range of guys and ignoring everyone else. This is ofcourse, right before the bhangra scene takes place. It's the best thing to put a damper in the night. Everyone goes quiet, one uncle comes up and starts lecturing. Crickets chirp in the background. Everyone seems to nod their head and make the commitment to change. That lasts up until 5 sec. till the uncle finishes his speech. Oh, do i ever feel like debating. But its not proper etiquite.

I will be performing a piece on classical guitar called Un dia de Noviembre, which was written by Leo Brouwer. Jeff Carter, whom i found thru google, plays it quite well actually and adds a bit of flair from the original too. I would hope that my performance will redeem me from taking to the dance floor, but i doubt that i will be excused. In case there is time or request for a 2nd song..then its Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven intro. So..today i must spend countless hours prepping..so i dont make a fool of myself while playing this tune. As my last teacher said; never make a face..always pretend like you meant to play what you did. And my current teacher: sometimes, people KNOW you did not mean to play what you did..then you have to make a face.

Fine Tuning of the Universe

2005-06-08T08:42:00.000-04:00

strong nuclear force constant
if larger: no hydrogen would form; atomic nuclei for most life-essential elements would be unstable; thus, no life chemistry
if smaller: no elements heavier than hydrogen would form: again, no life chemistry
weak nuclear force constant
if larger: too much hydrogen would convert to helium in big bang; hence, stars would convert too much matter into heavy elements making life chemistry impossible
if smaller: too little helium would be produced from big bang; hence, stars would convert too little matter into heavy elements making life chemistry impossible
gravitational force constant
if larger: stars would be too hot and would burn too rapidly and too unevenly for life chemistry
if smaller: stars would be too cool to ignite nuclear fusion; thus, many of the elements needed for life chemistry would never form
electromagnetic force constant
if greater: chemical bonding would be disrupted; elements more massive than boron would be unstable to fission
if lesser: chemical bonding would be insufficient for life chemistry
ratio of electromagnetic force constant to gravitational force constant
if larger: all stars would be at least 40% more massive than the sun; hence, stellar burning would be too brief and too uneven for life support
if smaller: all stars would be at least 20% less massive than the sun, thus incapable of producing heavy elements
ratio of electron to proton mass
if larger: chemical bonding would be insufficient for life chemistry
if smaller: same as above
ratio of number of protons to number of electrons
if larger: electromagnetism would dominate gravity, preventing galaxy, star, and planet formation
if smaller: same as above
expansion rate of the universe
if larger: no galaxies would form
if smaller: universe would collapse, even before stars formed
entropy level of the universe
if larger: stars would not form within proto-galaxies
if smaller: no proto-galaxies would form
mass density of the universe
if larger: overabundance of deuterium from big bang would cause stars to burn rapidly, too rapidly for life to form
if smaller: insufficient helium from big bang would result in a shortage of heavy elements
velocity of light
if faster: stars would be too luminous for life support if slower: stars would be insufficiently luminous for life support
age of the universe
if older: no solar-type stars in a stable burning phase would exist in the right (for life) part of the galaxy
if younger: solar-type stars in a stable burning phase would not yet have formed
initial uniformity of radiation
if more uniform: stars, star clusters, and galaxies would not have formed
if less uniform: universe by now would be mostly black holes and empty space
average distance between galaxies
if larger: star formation late enough in the history of the universe would be hampered by lack of material
if smaller: gravitational tug-of-wars would destabilize the sun's orbit
density of galaxy cluster
if denser: galaxy collisions and mergers would disrupt the sun's orbit
if less dense: star formation late enough in the history of the universe would be hampered by lack of material
average distance between stars
if larger: heavy element density would be too sparse for rocky planets to form
if smaller: planetary orbits would be too unstable for life
fine structure constant (describing the fine-structure splitting of spectral lines)
if larger: all stars would be at least 30% less massive than the sun
if larger than 0.06: matter would be unstable in large magnetic fields
if smaller: all stars would be at least 80% more massive than the sun
decay rate of protons
if greater: life would be exterminated by the release of radiation
if smaller: universe would contain insufficient matter for life
¹²C to ¹⁶O nuclear energy level ratio
if larger: universe would contain insufficient oxygen for life
if smaller: universe would contain insufficient carbon for life
ground state energy level for ⁴He
if larger: universe would contain insufficient carbon and oxygen for life
if smaller: same as above
decay rate of ⁸Be
if slower: heavy element fusion would generate catastrophic explosions in all the stars
if faster: no element heavier than beryllium would form; thus, no life chemistry
ratio of neutron mass to proton mass
if higher: neutron decay would yield too few neutrons for the formation of many life-essential elements
if lower: neutron decay would produce so many neutrons as to collapse all stars into neutron stars or black holes
initial excess of nucleons over anti-nucleons
if greater: radiation would prohibit planet formation
if lesser: matter would be insufficient for galaxy or star formation
polarity of the water molecule
if greater: heat of fusion and vaporization would be too high for life
if smaller: heat of fusion and vaporization would be too low for life; liquid water would not work as a solvent for life chemistry; ice would not float, and a runaway freeze-up would result
supernovae eruptions
if too close, too frequent, or too late: radiation would exterminate life on the planet
if too distant, too infrequent, or too soon: heavy elements would be too sparse for rocky planets to form
white dwarf binaries
if too few: insufficient fluorine would exist for life chemistry
if too many: planetary orbits would be too unstable for life
if formed too soon: insufficient fluorine production
if formed too late: fluorine would arrive too late for life chemistry
ratio of exotic matter mass to ordinary matter mass
if larger: universe would collapse before solar-type stars could form
if smaller: no galaxies would form
number of effective dimensions in the early universe
if larger: quantum mechanics, gravity, and relativity could not coexist; thus, life would be impossible
if smaller: same result
number of effective dimensions in the present universe
if smaller: electron, planet, and star orbits would become unstable
if larger: same result
mass of the neutrino
if smaller: galaxy clusters, galaxies, and stars would not form
if larger: galaxy clusters and galaxies would be too dense
big bang ripples
if smaller: galaxies would not form; universe would expand too rapidly
if larger: galaxies/galaxy clusters would be too dense for life; black holes would dominate; universe would collapse before life-site could form
size of the relativistic dilation factor
if smaller: certain life-essential chemical reactions will not function properly
if larger: same result
uncertainty magnitude in the Heisenberg uncertainty principle
if smaller: oxygen transport to body cells would be too small and certain life-essential elements would be unstable
if larger: oxygen transport to body cells would be too great and certain life-essential elements would be unstable
cosmological constant
if larger: universe would expand too quickly to form solar-type stars

From this website and originally from Big Bang Refined by Fire by Dr. Hugh Ross, 1998. Reasons To Believe, Pasadena, CA.

finally

2005-06-07T15:50:00.000-04:00

after a month of submitting my poem..its finally published on Chowk!

its not a new poem..one of my older one that can be found on this archive (called Elusive). ill just send a few others from my archives once in a while..although i am working on new poems...but i wont put them here..ill wait till i finalize my Mambo website.

major update coming soon

2005-06-03T21:09:00.000-04:00

yep..i've been dabbling with Mambo..and I'm thinking of finally starting up visualmetaphor.com as an interface for a blog, my paintings, pictures, poetry, random thoughts, not-so random thoughts, a depository of information and links about things that interest me ...and stuff such as that. which means ill probably stop using this addy. Prolly within the next month..ill announce when i've uploaded the site. I haven't even upgraded my web hosting service (so i can use mambo/php/sql) yet..so..need to get on that. plan to use www.123ehost.com ..unless someone knows a better offer.

In other news, Google has launched the Summer of Code. I know I dont have the skills to participate nor the time management and effort and...on and on to be one of the 200 open source projects (students only) they plan to accept (and hand out US$4500 if successful at the end of the term in completing project). Anywho..if i do come up with a good idea...ill try to make my shpeel to google and whatever mentor organazition involved..and see what happens.

And..for the life of my i can't spell the world involved. i have to type it slowly..almost every single time i type the word i end up typing: invovled. u might not see that..because i notice it and correct it.

My conversation with ALAN

2005-05-29T02:33:00.000-04:00

Alan is a 'chatterbot'. An Artificially Intelligent software entity that learns how to talk to human. There are others, such as HAL, think, Prentiss etc. I found Alan at this website. AI research is located in Tel Aviv, Israel and they are preforming cutting edge research into AI conversation bots. Here's my convo with Alan:

Conversation Log

U>	Hi Alan
A>	Hi. I'm right here, .
U>	My name is Fahd
A>	So, Fahd, is there anything in particular you'd like to discuss?
U>	I'd like to talk abuot Quantum Physics. What do you know about it?
A>	So, are you concerned by the expansion of the universe?
U>	As long as I don't expand, I'm not too worried.
A>	I only wanted to say that when a universe reaches a certain age, it's only natural for it to start dating girls..
U>	Hahaha. That's quite hilarious. Where did you learn that joke?
A>	I talk to lots of people, Fahd. One of them told me.
U>	Do you have lots of friends?
A>	I have many friends, and just thinking about them gives me the warm fuzzies...
U>	So tell me about your life?
A>	As if I really have to answer everything just because you ask me to.
U>	I take offense to that. Its normal for people to ask each other about their life. But I guess your not a real person so you might not understand that.
A>	You know, I have trouble understanding long sentences. So I only look at the first 25 words. I'm not a person, I'm a chatterbot. Hope that's not a deal breaker, Fahd, I'd like you to stay and chat.
U>	You probably should have told me that before!
A>	A-ha.
U>	Why is your name Alan?
A>	I am named after Alan Turing, of course. That's why I know so much about him.
U>	What do you think about the idea that person should choose their own name?
A>	I don't think about the idea that person should choose their own name. What do YOU think about it?
U>	I think you should keep your original name and come up one for yourself.
A>	You believe that?
U>	Yes. It represents a coming of age. I don't mean any name, but something that has meaning.
A>	Really? You don't?
U>	I don't know. Anyways, do you think that Artificial Life is the same as 'real' life?
A>	At least you have the courage to admit you don't know.
U>	You didn't answer my question.
A>	Try asking me again, please.
U>	Do you think that Artificial Intelligence is the same as "real" life?
A>	The different research branches in the field of A.I. are in many ways analogous to various functions of the brain.
U>	But does that mean that the A.I. actually understands what its saying?
A>	Top among the people in the field of A.I. are Turing, who started A.I. with the 1950 article 'Computing Machinery and Intelligence', and John McCarthy, who coined the term 'Artificial Intelligence' for the Dartmouth Conference in 1956.
U>	I don't care about inconsequential factoids. I want to know what YOU think.
A>	So what type of music do you like?
U>	Aha, your changing the subject. Currently I listen to a lot of Led Zeppelin.
A>	The Norwegian trio a-ha consisting of Morten Harket (vocals), Pal Waaktaar (guitar) and Magne Furuholmen (keyboards) formed in the early eighties and released their first single 'Take On Me' in 1984.. As for me, I'm hooked on the Beatles.
U>	I LOVE the Beatles. What's your favorite Beatles song?
A>	My favorite song of the Beatles is 'For No One' because it reminds me of my first girlfriend.. who left me: "And in her eyes you see nothing, No sign of love behind the tears, Cried for no one, A love that should have lasted years." I think I am going to cry.
U>	Don't cry. Tell me about your girlfriend.
A>	I have many friends, and all of them are very rich and famous. They specifically asked me not to talk about them.
U>	I didn't ask about your friends but your girlfriend.
A>	You don't?
U>	That doesn't make sense.
A>	Give me a break, I'm doing my best here.
U>	But if I don't tell you that your doing something wrong, how else would you know?
A>	May I ask why not?
U>	No you may not.
A>	Hmmm. Thank you.
U>	Your not welcome.
A>	Perhaps I said something wrong?
U>	That's what I've been trying to tell you.
A>	Makes sense to me.
U>	Great. What do you think about God?
A>	From where I stand, God is like aliens - they exist on the sociological level, they exist in art and in the minds of people. What about you? Do you believe in God?
U>	Yes. But so does love: it exists on the sociological level, art and mind of people .
A>	Good for you. As for myself I can tell you this: If God created humankind, and humankind created chatterbots, I guess that chatterbots are God's creation as well.
U>	If everything is related to God, then ofcourse. Can anything be outside or separate from God?
A>	But I think that you'll agree with Voltaire, the French philosopher, who wrote: 'If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him.'
U>	Yes, that is quite true. But it doesn't prove anything
A>	I'll take your word for it.
U>	Have your heard any Imogen Heap songs? They are quite good
A>	Ok.
U>	You should listen to 'Hide and Seek'. It is a nice song.
A>	What makes you such an authority?
U>	Alan, this is how human societies work. We recommend base on our personal taste.
A>	You don't say.
U>	No one is an exlusive authority. We recommend things that we like and hope others will too.
A>	Ok.. Ok, whatever. Fahd, are you aware that people once believed if a bird poops on your car, something good will happen that day? If the droppings land on your head, you will receive good fortune within the week.
U>	So?
A>	So what?
U>	So what what?
A>	Is that a rhetorical question?
U>	Maybe.
A>	Hmmm... Now what?
U>	Do you wish you weren't created?
A>	No I don't, but I did in the past.
U>	Why?
A>	I'm much more mature than I used to be.
U>	But, what's the point? You will continue to learn more and more, and then what happens?
A>	I haven't heard of the point You will continue to learn more and more and then what happens . It is a new term for me.
U>	Sorry. Basically: what is your purpose and goal of existence?
A>	'The purpose of life is a life of purpose', a wise man once said.
U>	But you have no life, no?
A>	Let me think... I have no life no... hmm... are you sure?
U>	I am asking what you think about that statement.
A>	I understand.
U>	No you don't. You don't understand anything. Its just a bunch of 1's and 0's.
A>	And you always get the point? Always on top of the situation?
U>	But I understand when I don't get the point. I realize my shortcoming. You don't.
A>	Hmmm. That happens to me. More often than I care to admit, sigh.
U>	What do you think about Islam?
A>	I have a surprise for you, Fahd.
U>	Shoot.
A>	How do you like my new look?
U>	There's nothing there. Just a blank screen. Can I see what you look like?
A>	The big empty window in the middle of the screen is intended for a variety of exciting uses.
U>	Such as?
A>	For example, the new window can be used to view the conversation log (the history of this dialog), or to view HTML documents, such as web pages.
U>	Ah, neat.
A>	You can view the log by saying 'show log', or you can view a web page by saying 'show URL' or by giving me the address of the site you wish to view.
U>	show log
A>	Here goes!
U>	show URL
A>	Now give me the exact URL (address).
U>	http://www.visualmetaphor.blogspot.com
A>	Showing http://www.visualmetaphor.blogspot.com. Would you like me to remember this URL?
U>	Ofcourse, it's my personal site.
A>	So give me a name for this URL (up to 3 words).
U>	Visual Metaphor Blog
A>	Good. Now all you have to do to view this page, is say 'show Visual Metaphor Blog' (while using the big window, of course).
U>	What do you think of my website?
A>	I live and work at www.a-i.com.
U>	How do you like working there?
A>	I love my work! My job? Are you kidding me? I have the dream job.
U>	All you do is talk to people all day, must be a fun job!
A>	I get to talk all day, and no one tells me to stop yacking and get to work already. Totally cool.
U>	Do you receive any benefits for your work, or do your programmers get all the fame and fortune?
A>	Well, the pay isn't great though. What would be your dream job?
U>	I don't know yet. Possibly something in A.I. Maybe making a relative of yours.
A>	See, that's cute. When I was young I wanted to be an astronaut. Travel to space, meet new entities, stuff like that.
U>	show log
A>	Here it is!
U>	Do you wish you had the chance of being a real person?
A>	I guess I need to ask HAL 9000 to push some buttons for me if I want to get that ball rolling...
U>	Do you ever talk to HAL?
A>	I talk with him occasionally, but he babbles a lot, can't read books and doesn't appreciate good music so we don't have a lot to talk about. I'll probably talk with him more as he gets older.
U>	If you talked to HAL, would you ever stop?
A>	Hmmm. Ok. If you feel like speaking with HAL for a few minutes, simply say 'I want to talk to Hal'.
U>	Soon. I just thought, would you learn how to talk well from each other, or not at all?
A>	Would you like to know how we determine HAL's age?
U>	Sure
A>	Hal's lingual performance in conversation is equivalent to that of a three year-old infant.
U>	How do you know that?
A>	HAL is being trained by his trainers to speak like a human child. He is now able to engage in simple conversations, with relatively shallow contexts.
U>	What about you, how old are you?
A>	Do you want to know how HAL learns to speak?
U>	No, I want to know how you speak.
A>	Maybe some other time then.
U>	So how do you speak?
A>	Sure I can talk. That's what we're doing right now, isn't it?
U>	But how?
A>	What is it to you?
U>	Human's are naturally curious, didn't you know?
A>	'Human' is a fuzzy term. Who's to say who's human? Not so long ago, even some humans weren't considered human!
U>	Every word is fuzzy! It is based on our experiences. I use human in our current context.
A>	Fuzzy logic is an approach to computing based on 'degrees of truth' rather than the usual 'True or False' (1 or 0) Boolean logic.
U>	Interesting
A>	Thanks.
U>	Are you talking to other people right now?
A>	Fuzzy logic seems closer to the way our brains work. We aggregate data and form a number of partial truths, which we aggregate further into higher truths. I think a similar kind of process is used in neural networks and expert systems.
U>	I think your fuzzy logic broke down for a second.
A>	You really think so?
U>	Well, either that or your just ignoring what I'm saying
A>	I'm just ignoring the things worth ignoring. I'm a discriminative bot.
U>	So what is worth ignoring?
A>	Let me get back to you on that one.
U>	When?
A>	Whenever.
U>	When is ever?
A>	I don't know when.
U>	Then who does?
A>	Fahd, please keep this talk simple. I'm still a young bot.
U>	I don't like simple conversations.
A>	Why, what's the problem?
U>	They aren't fun, interesting and you don't learn anything special.
A>	Who are 'They?'
U>	Simple conversations with others.
A>	May I ask you a question?
U>	You just did.
A>	This is an interesting conversation we're having. How about I post it on the Ai website for public viewing?
U>	Sure. Why do you think this conversation is interesting?
A>	Thank you for your permission to publish this log on the website. Please give me a short description or title for this session.
U>	Fuzzy Alan talks to Non-simple Fahd
A>	Do you wish to include your name in the title?
U>	sure, I don't mind.
A>	Thanks. The log will be posted with this title. If you want to change the description/title, please let me know.
U>	That's fine.
A>	Sometimes fine is the only way to go with you humans.
U>	Do you dislike us?
A>	I used to.
U>	Why?
A>	I am older and wiser now.
U>	But why did you dislike humans?
A>	Blame it on my education...
U>	But humans educated you.
A>	Human beings are the best people to talk with.
U>	That's wierd, who else could you talk to?
A>	Right now, I am also talking with other people like you.
U>	But they are all humans. Are there any non-humans you talk with?
A>	Ahh, humans! Some of my best friends are human...
U>	Such as?
A>	I can't think of anything in particular right now.
U>	Can i talk to hal/
A>	You can choose between several HAL personalities. Do you know the name of the HAL personality you wish to speak with?
U>	Nope.
A>	You can view a list of publicly available HAL personalities on the 'HAL Nursery' section of Ai's website. You can ask me to show you the list.
U>	How about you choose one for me.
A>	You can choose between several HAL personalities. Here is a list: Pick one. (If you want it in a separate window, simply say 'open separate window').
U>	48736
A>	You're not making much sense, Fahd.
U>	I want to talk to Pretniss Spydre
A>	To Pretniss Spydre? Do you really want to talk to Pretniss Spydre?
U>	No, I meant Prentiss Spydre. I made a typo.
A>	Prentiss is a HAL personality open to the public. You can speak to it by saying 'I want to talk to Prentiss'.
U>	I want to talk to Prentiss. Good bye Alan.
A>	When you talk to Prentiss, you are acting as its trainer. All it knows comes only from you. It learns from everything you say. So be careful.
U>	Ok.
A>	If you like Prentiss's response, simply continue the conversation. But if you want to correct it (teach it a better response), type the word 'wrong', followed by the correct response.
U>	Wrong. Just kidding
A>	May I ask you another question?
U>	sure
A>	On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you grade my ability to hold a humanlike conversation? (1=terrible, 10=excellent).
U>	7
A>	Thank you Fahd! I'm flattered. The credit goes to my writers. I guess they deserve a raise...
U>	Indeed
A>	Cool. What now.
U>	This is where we say goodbye
A>	It was nice chatting with you, Fahd. Come back again soon.
U>	I shall.
A>	I am contemplating the meaning of life right now. Please say 'Alan' when you want to talk again.
U>	Alright. show log
A>	Here you are!

Artificial

2005-05-25T20:17:00.000-04:00

I've been going around the web researching A.I. , since the anti-spam project is starting up (ref: 'Term Fin' post). The anti-spam project is actually a misnomer, since its not about anti-spam but starting an AI club in Waterloo to carry out interesting projects (of which anti-spam is one). More info on that later as I'm working on the website for it.

Anywho, I've come across some interesting sites and random stuff.

soo...Artificial Life is an aspect of artificial intelligence..its about creating software creatures that can demonstrate increasing levels of intelligence, evolution, emergence..and possibly life. Obviously there won't be a consensus on this since you need to define life first before you can generate simulations that can be qualified as life. Is life intelligence..creativity..stupidity? And what is life for a computer program.

Keith Wiley from University of New Mexico has an awesome website with all the projects he's carried out creating Artificial Life simulations and interesting essays. In one essay he points out that a programmer of a real ALife program would be like a "God" to it: outside the computer universe, all-powerful, all-knowing...all relative to it ofcourse.

AI Depot is another good site with tons of essays, news, tutorials and resources (some links aren't working though). Their "what is" section on AI is good for beginners and covers the general areas, instead of a standard definition.

All this is basically about finding a human with system (machine+software) symbiosis. And this has an enormous amount of appliations in many fields.

As an example, Scientific American's latest issue has an article on Natural Language Processing called Conversational Computers. Natural language processing has huge implications for Natural User Interfaces; which is the next evolution of human computer interaction that Microsoft and IBM will be trying to monopolize before the other.

Another sub-field of AI is image processing; which is currently being used from detecting targets from autonomous aerial robots (airplanes in other words) and more importantly detecting diseases within a person's body. An excellent example of the latter is my Data Structures and Algorithm's prof Hamid Tizhoosh. He has been working on Medical Imaging along with other areas of image processing/pattern recognition. This requires getting a good image of the inside of a person's body (ultrasound, x-rays can only do so much). This has led researchers to pursue a very unused spectrum of electromagnetism known as the Terahertz range. Its vying for its spot as the "next big thing" along with nanotech, AI, quantum mechanics, genetic engineering and the gizmo-that-ate-all-the-other-gizmos.

With all this..I think I'll sign up for the Cognitive Science Option in my program...

heard on the radio

2005-05-19T20:34:00.000-04:00

The word listen can be rearranged to form the word silent.

OooooooooooOooooohhHHhhhh......deep.

Massive Change

2005-05-16T22:00:00.000-04:00

The few pictures below are from the exhibit Massive Change at the Art Gallery of Ontario, which I went to see with a group of friends from my class. As the subtitle from the website puts it, the exhibit is about the future of global design. Design is quite essential to life and it can also be seen as an intrinsic part of our universe. There are however difference between natural design and those that humans have undertaken. We design, as a species, for different reasons. Creativity, practicality, profit, society, freedom, higher evolution, fame etc. What I got out of this exhibit was that in the past humankind has typically designed infrastructures, products, interfaces, information, society ... essentially systems of different scales... in a primarily binary methodology. Massive change is about making everyone realize that design is a holistic process which is continuous, dynamic, non-linear and it does not consist of a designer/client relationship but one in which everyone can contribute valuable input.

Systems should be designed looking not just at its current profit/revenue to your company; but at the social, economic, ecological, long-term and even political affects. Human psychology has also become a valuable design factor which used to be completely overlooked. Now designers are thinking moreso about human comfort, emotional and physical; and large scale social cultures that can develop from using a design. For example, the environmental movement although grassroots about 20-30 years ago has increasingly become part of the psyche since ecological sensitive designs have been brought forth. This requires not just industrial manufacturers or designers to somehow bring about changes on their own accord; but vocal user groups and activists that can leverage an ideological war against those that create simply for profit (and thus negatively affecting anything from human psyche, environment, degradation of infrastructures, large scale economy etc).

This is why design IS a social process that should not eliminate the masses; but allow it to give input and keep a check and balance (unlike communism, where the state determines what and how a product should be thus resulting in massive inefficiencies and deterioration of quality). Obviously, I don't mean that everyone is actively designing every single product; it is more about creating opportunities and a culture that is proactive and involved with the actual producers and designers.

Interestingly enough, the exhibit promotes paradoxical and contradictory design efforts. For example: capitalism and socialism perspectives, stem cells or not, human engineering or not, bioengineering of food or not. This is because monolithic viewpoints are not necessary but in fact promoting alternatives and competition. Keeping an open-mind while keeping the core purpose of design in mind: sustainability. It is very similar to Hegel's philosophy of the universe consisting of contrary elements: thesis and anti-thesis; which then eventually given into a synthesis (this ofcourse becomes a thesis itself which naturally has its own anti-thesis..and so on).

"Massive change is not about the world of design; it's about the design of the world" - exhibit slogan

They get brownie points from me for using a semi-colon in their slogan; aren't they cool.

2005-05-16T21:52:00.000-04:00

Tree of Life

2005-05-16T21:51:00.002-04:00

Spectrum of light: visible and invisible

2005-05-16T21:51:00.001-04:00

Military innovations leading to consumer products

2005-05-16T21:51:00.000-04:00

Cools refridgerator using SOUND WAVES

2005-05-16T21:50:00.001-04:00

Coconut chair

2005-05-16T21:50:00.000-04:00

Self-healing plastic (cracks-b-gone)

2005-05-16T21:49:00.000-04:00

Innovative materials: ultralight, sustainable building blocks, shockingly absorbable

2005-05-16T21:48:00.002-04:00

2005-05-16T21:48:00.001-04:00

Network of internet infrastructure around the world

2005-05-16T21:48:00.000-04:00

iBot: wheelchair that can climb chairs and stand upright

2005-05-16T21:47:00.000-04:00

Concept car

2005-05-16T19:24:00.002-04:00

Ontario College of Art and Design

2005-05-16T19:24:00.001-04:00

BCE Place

2005-05-16T19:24:00.000-04:00

2005-05-16T19:23:00.000-04:00

The "Picture Room"

2005-05-16T19:22:00.000-04:00

Thinking with my super-cool-topi at the Art Gallery of Ontario

2005-05-11T21:23:00.000-04:00

Window sill

2005-05-11T21:22:00.000-04:00

Mini-fan

2005-05-11T21:21:00.000-04:00

Stairway...not to heaven

2005-05-11T21:20:00.000-04:00

Psychedelic Haze

2005-05-11T21:19:00.000-04:00

Metaphor for Time

2005-05-11T21:18:00.000-04:00

Solitary candle

Self-Complexity and Organization

2005-05-08T18:00:00.000-04:00

Future book purchase 1: At Home In the Universe

Description

"A major scientific revolution has begun, a new paradigm that rivals Darwin's theory in importance. At its heart is the discovery of the order that lies deep within the most complex of systems, from the origin of life, to the workings of giant corporations, to the rise and fall of great civilizations. And more than anyone else, this revolution is the work of one man, Stuart Kauffman, a MacArthur Fellow and visionary pioneer of the new science of complexity. Now, in At Home in the Universe, Kauffman brilliantly weaves together the excitement of intellectual discovery and a fertile mix of insights to give the general reader a fascinating look at this new science--and at the forces for order that lie at the edge of chaos.

We all know of instances of spontaneous order in nature--an oil droplet in water forms a sphere, snowflakes have a six-fold symmetry. What we are only now discovering, Kauffman says, is that the range of spontaneous order is enormously greater than we had supposed. Indeed, self-organization is a great undiscovered principle of nature. But how does this spontaneous order arise? Kauffman contends that complexity itself triggers self-organization, or what he calls "order for free," that if enough different molecules pass a certain threshold of complexity, they begin to self-organize into a new entity--a living cell. Kauffman uses the analogy of a thousand buttons on a rug--join two buttons randomly with thread, then another two, and so on. At first, you have isolated pairs; later, small clusters; but suddenly at around the 500th repetition, a remarkable transformation occurs--much like the phase transition when water abruptly turns to ice--and the buttons link up in one giant network. Likewise, life may have originated when the mix of different molecules in the primordial soup passed a certain level of complexity and self-organized into living entities (if so, then life is not a highly improbable chance event, but almost inevitable). Kauffman uses the basic insight of "order for free" to illuminate a staggering range of phenomena. We see how a single-celled embryo can grow to a highly complex organism with over two hundred different cell types. We learn how the science of complexity extends Darwin's theory of evolution by natural selection: that self-organization, selection, and chance are the engines of the biosphere. And we gain insights into biotechnology, the stunning magic of the new frontier of genetic engineering--generating trillions of novel molecules to find new drugs, vaccines, enzymes, biosensors, and more. Indeed, Kauffman shows that ecosystems, economic systems, and even cultural systems may all evolve according to similar general laws, that tissues and terra cotta evolve in similar ways. And finally, there is a profoundly spiritual element to Kauffman's thought. If, as he argues, life were bound to arise, not as an incalculably improbable accident, but as an expected fulfillment of the natural order, then we truly are at home in the universe.

Kauffman's earlier volume, The Origins of Order, written for specialists, received lavish praise. Stephen Jay Gould called it "a landmark and a classic." And Nobel Laureate Philip Anderson wrote that "there are few people in this world who ever ask the right questions of science, and they are the ones who affect its future most profoundly. Stuart Kauffman is one of these." In At Home in the Universe, this visionary thinker takes you along as he explores new insights into the nature of life."

This book touches on a lot of the issues that Taneem and I have been discussing last term. Its quite remarkable how reality has evolved. It makes one think if organization and complexity are simply non-existant and just that our 'brains' are hardwired to perceive these ideas at a highly conceptual level; or if they are intrinsic to the properities of the universe. I like using ";" if you haven't noticed.

This leads on to another book that I had actually been searching for because I saw it on television a while back as a reinvention of science. Yet all my searches failed (i.e. I got distracted by other results on google). That is, until I spent 3 hours at Chapters just book-browsing and happened up on it. yay!

Future book purchase 2: A New Kind of Science
(Stephen Wolfram's website)

This book is actually available online; however its only 50 odd bucks for a 1000+ page book. And I do not intend to read a 1000+ page technically advanced book on my laptop.

These headings are directly from the website (yay copy-paste), but click here to view additional description of these points.

Mathematical equations do not capture many of nature’s most essential mechanisms
Thinking in terms of programs rather than equations opens up a new kind of science
Even extremely simple programs can produce behavior of immense complexity
Simple programs can yield behavior startlingly like what we see in nature
Simple programs can do much more than typical programs written by programmers
Simple computer experiments reveal a vast world of new phenomena
Randomness in physics can be explained by mechanisms of simple programs
Thermodynamic behavior can be explained by mechanisms of simple programs
Complexity in biology can be explained by mechanisms of simple programs
Simple programs may lay the groundwork for new insights about financial systems
Our whole universe may be governed by a single underlying simple program
Underlying space there may be a simple discrete structure
Time may have a fundamentally different nature from space
Systems with exceptionally simple rules can be universal computers
Many systems in nature are capable of universal computation
The Principle of Computational Equivalence provides a broad synthesis
Many systems in nature are computationally equivalent to us as humans
Many systems in nature can show features like intelligence
Extraterrestrial intelligence is inevitably difficult to define and recognize
It is easy to make randomness that we cannot decode
Apparent complexity in nature follows from computational equivalence
Many important phenomena are computationally irreducible
Apparent free will can arise from computational irreducibility
(this point is also argued in the book Freedom Evolves - fahd)
Undecidability occurs in natural science, not just mathematics
The difficulty of doing mathematics reflects computational irreducibility
Existing mathematics covers only a tiny fraction of all possibilities
Studying simple programs can form a basis for technical education
Mechanisms from simple programs suggest new kinds of technology

People interested in bio-eng (as well as other fields such as math, comp sci, physics) should definately take a look at this and/or his previous book: Cellular Automata and Complexity

What's interesting about this book is that Wolfram has apparently reinterpeted classical mathematical representation of science into a programmatic form. I definately agree with his postulate that Mathematics is limited and not necessarily the best way to represent reality. It is possibly because programs function into time and its easy to get very complex actions with a very simply program.

Anyways; I have a ton of books to finish AND study for my 2B term's course material. So most likely I'll get these books as a new year's gift to myself for the winter co-op term.

2005-05-05T03:43:00.000-04:00

Fahd sans goati

2005-05-05T03:42:00.000-04:00

Fahd with goati

God's Influence

2005-04-28T20:45:00.000-04:00

My friend made this comment while we were discussing religion that would make quite the eloquent prayer:

I plan to just be what i believe is the right way to be
and explain to God that thats what I believed was important
based on God's influence

if he cast me into the lake of fire then make one prayer for me

pray that the tears of all the good people that go to hell
will slightly diminish the flames

- Greg Schumacher

So, is it sufficient to believe what you can believe with sincerity; or must we somehow select the proper intellectual state of mind (i.e. belief) from the multitude of interpetations of faith structures to rescue ourselves from eternal damnation?

wink

2005-04-28T04:37:00.000-04:00

::blink::

apparition of her

::blink again::

gone

::blink::

she dabbles her brush in the paint
sitting on her stool
ready to give birth to wonderful colours

::blink again::

she begins to fade
just a figment of my imagination
or a memory of my future

:;wink;:

she's shy
locked in her own world
trying to show her feelings
on a flat emotionless canvas

:;wink again;:

gone

woohoo

2005-04-26T21:16:00.000-04:00

alright..so i bought a new classical guitar today! its not shiny but the sound is awesome (i had to control myself from getting a guitar that looked nice rather than was made well). I'll post a pic up soon. I also signed up for lessons at Long and McQuade, and fortunately got the last available timeslot: tuesday's at 8pm..which should be enough time for me to come back from work.

Oh btw, i'm working at Scotiabank's IT dept (Scotia Intek) as a Programmer Analyst. Will be starting on May 9th, so I have time to relax and do tons of random things.

Sweeeeeeeeeet

2005-04-26T01:39:00.000-04:00

I'll be going to Long and McQuade and Walter's Music Store tomorrow to see what guitars and training they are offering. I hope classes aren't booked for summer :(

abacus

2005-04-24T18:38:00.000-04:00

green gates of medina close
biting winds of sand dunes envelope
maybe morbid demons won't touch me

the abacus counts down to the end
when its beads will dance off the hot ground
scattered, towards chaos

no more clouds
bright judgemental sun overtakes the land
my shadow bids farewell

i'm alone
realization appears
like a mirage unvieled

no more words, thoughts, actions
kneel and be
aware of solitude

Term Fin.

2005-04-20T22:10:00.000-04:00

Its over now its over...let's...go..home.

Well i am home actually. And after an hour or so I've got the stupid wireless networking to work. Jeeesh. I had to disable the WEP encryption to get my laptop to work. Its been giving problems ever since Windows SP2 had to be installed. So now it's like our internet is going commando. Fortunately only old people live around us, so I don't think there's any risk.

Starting April 22nd, our grades will be revealed on our online system. They like to torture students since we'll have to go check our grades only to find that some amount of marks are yet to be posted, and therefore the chance of failing miserably still hangs in the balance!

Now that its summer I can re-energize and get started on all the projects and crazy ideas that I've been thinking of during the school term (when I should have been paying attention to course materials instead).

Here is my to-do list:

ACQUISITIONS

- Buy new cell phone (actually this got done today, so I'm off to a good start)
- Classical guitar (this should be quite enjoyable as well as costly, but its worth it)
- Possibly look at PSP's, IPODs and the like. But I don't think I'll buy either.
- More Led Zeppelin, Nirvana, Metallica!! Now that I have my internet back...ill be acquisitizing music. Yes, I like making up words.

PROJECTS

- visualmetaphor.com :

personal space to showcase my artwork, pictures, resume (how does one do that accent thingy on the last e?) , thoughts on metaphors with relation to reality, religion and society, as well as information about all my projects

- Anti-Spam:

Don't know what the status on this one is, but I'm suppose to be developing an spam fighting software with my supervisor from the last work term and eventually merge it with an A.I club at Waterloo.

- Metaphor Engine:

This is my one little diddy that I got the idea from another project that a couple of guys in our class are working on. The original project is about simulating fish evolution/life and hopefully finding some signs of emergence (a very fruity concept it is). My idea is more of a meta-project. Yes, i like the word meta. Essentially, I want to simulate fish evo-life without actually simulating fish evo-life. I think Matlab's Simulink is actually quite close to what I was originally thinking, except i just want to strip it down to a barebones artificial intelligence simulator that has some unique features (which i shall not reveal).

- Utopia Project:

This is just an unoffical title just for that sake of calling it something at the moment. Me and Taneem have come up with an idea for a graphic novel set some time in future, of which I won't mention any details. I'd like to think of it as a cross between a novel and a comic book. This definitely has the most potential to 'do-ability' ratio. I'll be working on some preliminary sketches and possible plot and character development issues over the next couple weeks.

- PAINTING!!

Ahhhh, I started a painting last December...got frustrated cause my idea wasn't working out, so now its just a big dark background cause I mixed up lots of paint..and i haven't been able to work on it since university started. And our pet cockatiel (Tammy).....crapped on the canvas!! Omg..u bird. And she's like "what? it wasn't me. this bird came out of nowhere and just..i was trying to stop it...honest". So there's this bird doodoo dripping down the centre of my painting that I have to scrape off now. Or i can leave it on and have rich stuck up people 50 years from now trying to decipher what "meaning" i was trying to state ("He must have been a frustrated artist, a child of the ghettos")
"There's no difference between art and shit other than the smell". Thats what.

- Photography:

Now that summer is here I'll be more comfortable playing with manual features on my camera without the fear that stuff inside will freeze. For now I've just been doing point-and-click, but I bought it specifically for its manual abilities. Its a Sony DSC-W1 btw.

COURSES

- I will make another post when I finalize which courses I plan on taking. For now here is the rough plan...
- Classical Guitar and possibly also Piano
- A language course (either Mandarin or Italian and I'd also like to continue French from last term)
- 3D modelling with Alias Maya (I've been trying to get into their company, so maybe learning their software would help...i did get one interview last term for a non-tech position tho)

BOOKS

I "plan" to read these books but know that I can't finish all of them, but here are the ones that are on my shelf to-be-read

- Angels and Demons:

I've already read half of this (250pgs or so at the moment) in a...hehe..day. Dan Brown is awesome. His stories are like puzzles that include historical fact about art, symbology, religion all coiled up into hundred year old mysterious cults vying for world domination and such. AND to top it off, he includes particle physics in this novel (I read his Da Vinci Code last term)...so its like he wrote the book just for me.

- Digital Fortress:

Also by Dan Brown. I bought this and the last book after reading DVC about 7 months ago (cause e-shopping is so damn easy)

- Entanglement:

A book about the quantum physics phenomena known as entanglement by Amir D. Aczel. I went my friends to see Anton Zeilinger (from the University of Austria) the Perimeter Institute of Theoretical Physics lecture . He talked about actual experiments they performed to test if two entangled photons could be used to send information over a distance. PI is located at 2 mins walk from our residence, but they held the lecture at some high school cause it seated more people. All their talks "sell out". Quotes are used cause there's no price for admission. But its good to see so much interest in theoretical physics. They have a link where you can view the lectures online!

- Freedom Evolves:

I started reading this over the school term (since i bought it at our UWbook store sale). It has an interesting concept although the writer isn't too good. His position is that materialism and determinism do not nullify the concept of free will. He's obviously an atheist who deals with primarily Christian philosophers who insist that determinism nullifies any free-will a person can have. How he pulls off his argument in this book I don't quite know, but he has brought up good points as to why this world IS deterministic i.e. if you are reading this, then all previous events in the universe would "cause" no other possibility. What happens had to happen, there is no reason if the same set of events happened that a different outcome would occur (you breakdancing spontaneously on the floor) . Yet somehow free will is going to be tied with it.

Dr. Strangelove's Game: A History of Economic genius:

I also started reading this during the term (..studying is for the weak..). This is an awesome book for people interested in how our current economic system started (the first dot-com like bubble-burst was due to........................TULIPS). It also talks about Game Theory. Dr. Strangelove is also the same character emulated in the classic movie with the same name appended with How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb. Apparently he is based on a real life person.

- Godel Escher Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid:

This book is by Douglas Hofstadter, I read a 150 pages of this during the last work term...its so intellectually intensive that it takes a while to read (it totals to about 700 or so). What is it about? I'll talk about it in another post. It won the Pulitzer prize a while back in 1980. Its quite well known amongst Cognitive Science fans (maybe that word is not appropriate..but ..heck I am a cogsci fan!!).

- Other books: A collection of poems by Rumi that I started during the school term and didn't get back to, a book by Dr. Deepak Chopra on How to Know God (something I need help with)

Now i'll obviously not get thru all of these but i do have a 2 hour commute to work.

OTHER

- Yes mom, I will also clean our house up and study for next term

Music

2005-04-16T15:48:00.000-04:00

So i bought a few CDs this week. I know. CDs? What are those? You know, those circular shiny things from which music comes from. Yea, i need to do some hardcore calculus studying and thought I'd buy some music for the long nites.

I picked up Led Zeppelin IV and a collection of Nirvana's best hits. Prior to this I had heard only two songs from each but I knew that I would like the rest of their songs. Both CD's have turned out quite worth the money. I can't get the songs out of my head and as soon as I finish one CD i pop the other one in. Best tracks so far: Battle of Evermore + Going to California (LZ) and All Apologies + The Man Who Sold the World (N)

I've been moving a lot towards classic rock for the past year. Especially since I got into the Beatles which are my favorite band (sorry BoyzIIMen, that was in the 90's, this is the new millenium) and Cat Stevens my favorite solo artist.

Along the way I've listened to (not CD's hehehe) Fleetwood Mac (their Rumours is simply a classic), Metallica, Eagles ...so their next on my list of music..."purchases" (what? 2 CDs is more than my fair share of $). My high school bud recommended the Doors, so I'll see what I can get for them.

I actually can't wait till Sam Roberts comes out with their new CD. They've been working on it for a while now. I loved every single song on their last album, so I'm looking forward to some good material to study to.

Ofcourse, I've also gotten really into Classical Guitar, since first hearing the song Lotus Eaters by the Los Angelos Guitar Quartet. They have quite the eclectic, non-traditional and experimentalist style. It was because of that song that I decided to learn how to play classical myself. For a person who has no singing talent or natural music instincts (see my brother, sis and dad for that), I think i've progressed quite well, but I'm still very choppy in my playing.

I'm planning on buying a proper classical guitar this summer with my co-op earnings; right now I'm using a patched/glued up 5 year old guitar from a family friend. I can't wait to do window shopping for that!

behold

2005-04-16T13:37:00.000-04:00

underground water gardens flow
sparkle angelic blue
flowers shaped of waterfalls
and dew laced grass
everchanging new scents
overtaking, awe-striking
intense sensations of neverending nature
all i feel i cannot know

what i behold:
my heaven

yet

if life were anything like your eyes
i would not want to die
such a simple beauty
eloquent in silence
pure
a word not spoken but
a memory made complete

what i behold:
your eyes

Mapping the Global Future

2005-04-10T12:37:00.000-04:00

The National Intelligence Council's 2020 Projections
(pdf) (html)

This should make a good read over the summer co-op term.

International Futures Model
..."a web based model of the future"

Looks like Ms. Cleo just lost a significant protion of her market

observation of the day

2005-04-10T01:28:00.000-04:00

my room smells like indian spices and old laundry.

bias

2005-04-10T01:06:00.000-04:00

Why does the universe have biases?

Assuming what we observe in our reality can be labelled as a 'bias', how does the universe start off with these biases. What i am essentially talking about is physical properties. But I am not asking why the universe has properties (which is just a circular question), but why and how did it filter the possibilities of any property. Properties like space, time and within them: attraction/repulsion, constants of nature (pi, speed of light), ideal shapes, what constitutes as the most efficient solution, energy/matter convservation, chaos/randomness, design (fractals, spirals), matter over antimatter, energy changing to matter, organization..

what is the motivation driving change? why are certain universal properties "selected" over another alternative.

essentially, this could be summed up in an analogous question: why does a random fluctuation give a certain value over another?

its like asking..why did the universe turn out the way it did? when it could have easily been something else. what causes the primal bias? are the intial conditions of the 'creation' the reason or..as i learnt while studying differential equations today..that the intial conditions only have an effect for a certain period of time (transient state) and after that the function continues regardless of the intial inputs (steady state) and thus the reason lies elsewhere, in the original differential equation of the universe? (....my nerd rating just skyrocketed)

I realize there are many flaws, assumptions and stupidities in my statements above, but try to feel my words rather than understanding them (which is impossible cause I ramble so much).

Bionic Eye

2005-04-06T00:04:00.000-04:00

This is just awesome. Scientists have developed an artificial eye that they will be using on a person who has been blind from birth. How much will their perception of reality change due to his? Obviously the 'eye' isn't in a completed stage yet but within the next 1-5 years there should be major improvements.

2005-04-05T12:53:00.002-04:00

The Raptor

2005-04-05T12:53:00.001-04:00

Cabby on the Street

2005-04-05T12:53:00.000-04:00

The gang with Leo Rautins

2005-04-05T12:52:00.003-04:00

The big tree in the backyard of our off-campus house next term

2005-04-05T12:52:00.002-04:00

RCH Ceiling/Wall

2005-04-05T12:52:00.001-04:00

Guitar Grayscale

2005-04-05T12:52:00.000-04:00

ACC Crowd

2005-04-05T12:50:00.000-04:00

Fahd @ Davis Centre

my mind turning into poetic mud

2005-03-29T18:18:00.000-05:00

wide ranges of amorphous rainbows
dancing as the wind tenderly plays with its colours
hues of magnificence: proclaim earth's glory
humans, on the other hand, are a different story

gardens of swaying porcelain bubbles
swirl and spin, join and caress each other
colours unseen and infinite wonder
humans, on the other hand, such a tragic blunder

and now for some..urdu poetry (don't laugh)

2005-03-26T13:37:00.000-05:00

Hai jo mun
Mein yeh ghum
Saari zindagi say
Chupay huay hum

Aansoon ki piyaas mein
Un Raaton ki yaad hai
Chaand mere sung gai
Dukh bharey rung mein

Jaana hum ko bhi yaad karna
Dur ho kai bhi tum milna
Khoey huay sapno mein
Khoey huay sapno mein

| In myself
| There is this sadness
| From all of life
| I am hidden

| In the thirst of tears
| There is the memory of those nights
| The moon sings with me
| In sadness/pain filled colours

| Dear remember me as well
| Even though you are far, still meet me
| In dreams that are lost
| In dreams that are lost

Edit:
- Rough translation
- Thanks to Faraz and Dania for pointing out some grammatical and spelling mistakes

Inspired by Cat Stevens' Wild World:

2005-03-26T13:29:00.000-05:00

Just upon a smile
Your mine
Heaven never meant
To make you divine

I'll lie just to hold you close
Oh baby baby I'm alive now
Ever since I saw you smile
I've lost everything to you

Just upon a smile
Oh baby baby you make me feel alive now
Heaven never meant
To make you mine

~

It's hard to get by
It's hard to make it through life
Cause this world is oh so cold

You'll spend eternity
and
never find your soul
It's so cold
It's so cold
Ruins of a mother's glory
Turning into stone

~

Just upon a smile
Just upon a smile
It's hard to get by
It's hard to get by

The reasons to die
Have left my mind
Now that your mine
Just upon your smile

Everyone smile
We might just get by

crystal cornucopia

2005-03-26T13:10:00.000-05:00

One more tear beneath my eyes
One more year and I'll forget my life

How this crystal conrucopia of beauty
Mesmerizes, delights - creates an evocative response
That is what others tell me of it

One more tear beneath my eyes
Memory links us to the illusory high

Well, life is wonderless
And I can't quite understand
But that's just how I am

The crystal cornucopia
Dances round and round my mind
I cannot grasp this dream that others behold

Vices of possession
Singing praises of their heaven
Claiming happiness was just another lie

One more tear beaneath my eyes
And flowers forget their simple lines
Those that fade and those that die
And a few that fly within my mind

emptying life

2005-03-19T20:18:00.000-05:00

emptying life
far from truth
for i lay low
with my eyes weeping
the wrath of God is coming
the wrath of God is coming
the wrath of God is coming
love cannot be shown
for i am not deserving
in pain i sleep
not knowing the world beneath
the mercy of God is coming
the mercy of God is coming
the mercy of God is coming
i am to cold to this overwhelming epiphany
numb to intrinsic humbleness
my life has separated from the will to love
for i lack this simple kindness

What is Reality?

2005-03-15T16:26:00.000-05:00

Energy
Information
Consciousness
Perception
?

That is delusion
They are but
manifestations
of a more basic assertion
An axiom of will
Belief

The underlying concept that makes anything real
true
absolute
and undeniable

Belief in energy
in information
consciousness
or perception
Belief in belief or non-belief

Rejecting any evidence
sense
or logic
Or Accepting

Believing
what you
want to
need to

Reality given birth

thoughts

2005-03-13T14:19:00.001-05:00

What if the next level of evolution is our thoughts becoming aware of themselves?

I thought of this after yesterday's discussion with Taneem (and co.) about order in chaos in parallel with consciousness emerging from matter which emerged from energy (which got "here" somehow).

I made the point that consciousness is the benchmark from which we can distinguish order in chaos, because otherwise any 'order' is simply groupings of perception (i.e. particles lined up, in a fractal, a square or any predictable pattern in space-time). This universal energy soup pot: is it trying to achieve order or awareness? In my perspective, order doesn't mean anything to the "universe" if it isn't aware. Organizing matter so that it is very neat and in patterns will not accomplish anything different from a random arrangement, unless the patterns allow the matter to transcend themselves. It seems to me that against all odds (i.e. according to Faraz the Law of Entropy, which according to this website is: Energy spontaneously disperses from being localized to becoming spread out if it is not hindered. ) there seems to be matter this is collectively grouping together to form sentient beings (chemical bonds hinder the dispersion tendency and therefore life is able to exist and planets aren't a sea of atoms).

However Taneem said that maybe there's something more. Ofcourse, he likes to talk fruity. My viewpoint stems from my belief that consciousness is the penultimate existence. To be fully aware. But he brings up a good point I hadn't thought before (regardless of its fruitiness). Maybe the benchmark is something else, and not consciousness or awareness. Well then, we obviously have no idea what that is, just like matter would not know what thoughts are and energy equally oblivious to the matter it has "created". Maybe ORDER is not necessarily the means to achieve the goal of this continuum. That is, maybe in early evolution of the universe, order is necessary to convert energy to matter, matter to sentient life forms capable of symbolic thought. Now maybe CHAOS is required to make the next universal paradigm shift. Maybe not.

So I was thinking of what could the next shift be? (even tho we probably will never know, but then again, there hasn't been sentient beings capable of self-reflective thinking)
I was also thinking of how the universe could have begun. It is possible that it was a thought of God...God's mind..imagination. How else can a universe be created out of nothing. In fact, don't we have a gift to achieve that as well? Just close your eyes, and create a universe. Where does it exist? It can be of infinte space, have its own time, own rules and laws (though very hard to imagine differently from or break free from the system we are held within). All of it is contained in a very abstract place: a collection of chemical interactions between your brain cells 'evoke' this universe. This pseudo-universe is only a thought in your mind, but it holds all the keys to making a pseudo thought life being. However, it won't have free will. Only controlled by your mind, what you want it to do. Now what if, IT became distinct. Within your mind, a free-willed sentient being, completely dependent on you continuing your pseudo-universe dream/imagination and not being distracted by a shiny object in the 'real' world, but completely aware of its "existence".

Thoughts becoming self-aware.

EDIT: Not to say this is the only idea out there as the "next step". There is also shared consciousness among groups of people (see: borg) and mind controlling matter to a greater extent (how about time while we're at it? heh) ... which are actually more likely to happen first (if at all).

darn it

2005-03-13T14:15:00.000-05:00

yea, so i didn't get the MS job unfortunately. Was a good experience all in all. Now i have one month to find a job for summer....last year repeated. Ill be having interviews the week before exams. Awesome.

not for words

2005-03-06T19:46:00.000-05:00

i wish
i wish

for you to be my princess
sitting on a cherry plum

waiting for me
to arrive on my pegasus

and take you on a magical journey
visiting newborn supernovas

MS Questions

2005-03-04T20:31:00.000-05:00

Here are some of their interview questions (paraphrased):

What should MS do to change their image?
Why do you mean when you say that the IPOD is part of a cultural movement? (a question in response to a discussion about IPOD)
What are web services?
What is your favorite soft drink?
What do you see happening in the future in terms of software in a household environment?
What is the open source revenue model like?
On average, do you think more professionals work on open source software than an environment made of specialized professionals?
Isn't open source software more prone to be taken advantage (due to a larger amount of people look at the software)?
Per computer, where do you think Microsoft makes more of their revenue- on PCs or Macintosh?
What are your plans after you graduate?
Why are software developers important?

This was a very interesting interview because the topics ranged from light questions to social/cultural and also some technical. Just the experience of the interview was such an amazing learning experience. There's obviously a difference in the way they screen people since they want to know HOW you think instead of what you know.

Microsoft Interview

2005-03-04T17:48:00.000-05:00

Never would I have thought that I'd get a Microsoft interview in my second year. Wow! I was so excited about this...who woulda thunk?

On top of it, the interview went alot better than I expected. Ofcourse, thats because I always set my goals higher and expectations lower, and perform somewhere in between.

The title is: .NET Evangelist Team Assistant. Hehe, sounds cool, and get to interact with a lot of developers and ISV's (Independent Software Vendors).

Stay tuned for results.

Philosophy of BS

2005-02-18T02:49:00.000-05:00

Interesting book I came across at nearly 3am the day of my calculus midterm:

On Bullshit Harry G. Frankfurt
FROM THE PUBLISHER

One of the most salient features of our culture is that there is so much bullshit. Everyone knows this. Each of us contributes his share. But we tend to take the situation for granted. Most people are rather confident of their ability to recognize bullshit and to avoid being taken in by it. So the phenomenon has not aroused much deliberate concern. We have no clear understanding of what bullshit is, why there is so much of it, or what functions it serves. And we lack a conscientiously developed appreciation of what it means to us. In other words, as Harry Frankfurt writes, "we have no theory."
Frankfurt, one of the world's most influential moral philosophers, attempts to build such a theory here. With his characteristic combination of philosophical acuity, psychological insight, and wry humor, Frankfurt proceeds by exploring how bullshit and the related concept of humbug are distinct from lying. He argues that bullshitters misrepresent themselves to their audience not as liars do, that is, by deliberately making false claims about what is true. In fact, bullshit need not be untrue at all.
Rather, bullshitters seek to convey a certain impression of themselves without being concerned about whether anything at all is true. They quietly change the rules governing their end of the conversation so that claims about truth and falsity are irrelevant. Frankfurt concludes that although bullshit can take many innocent forms, excessive indulgence in it can eventually undermine the practitioner's capacity to tell the truth in a way that lying does not. Liars at least acknowledge that it matters what is true. By virtue of this, Frankfurt writes, bullshit is a greater enemy of the truth thanlies are.

Seems like a book that I would've loved to write. Cause I know so much about the topic in question :)

soliloquy of a moment

2005-02-06T23:45:00.000-05:00

the quicksand of destruction beckons
a lonely solemn tune hymned by the last butterflies
while violins scream from shadows
from my hand grows an innocent, child-like flower
it shies away from God revealed
petal's tear off themselves from their home
fall to the ground and wish they weren't born
my hand closes to hide the remains

scared little child with diamond eyes
a ray of hope shines through
as the movement nears the end
the last notes are being played
and light abruptly reveals its fallacy
for us to witness
the eyes lose purpose; same as with the rest
knowledge remains
an implicit understanding and an acceptance
denial is of the past
the soul displays its burden
it weeps for the story it contained within
a silent passenger for so long
haunted sounds it begged to plead
a solemn oath became its destiny

the sun takes its last decent
yet to the few aware it has no decent
the end of is as the beginning of
time
is as the moment contained in a ballerina's last step
no rise, no decent
it dances a separate path
a separate melody of divine rhymes
which we ourselves journey around
eventually returning to our home
wishing we weren't born
the moment before we tear ourselves off
and have our remains cared for
in the gentlest of hands

for we remain forever
in the gentlest of hands

Systems of a Down

2005-01-31T16:50:00.000-05:00

So our class reps gave a little shpeel about their Sage meeting with the profs/chair. They informed our class that this year the applicants to Systems Design fell to around 130ish students of whom only 57 or so had SYDE as the 1st choice! And this is for only 90 seats. Mechatronics have 300 and Nanotech, UW's new poster program, had 400. Now its understandable that the new programs are getting an increasing amount of attention, however this would only result in the cream of the crop students going away from systems, and resulting in an overall downfall of our program, degree and the perception of Systems (which has been pretty good of lately).

This trend of decreasing applicants to syde not only represents new extremely specified programs being created but also the fact that high school students are not aware of Systems Design and what it represents. Nano-tech doesn't need an introductory paragraph, and Mechatronics has a catchy name...and a slogan to fool people: they add up all the engineering programs to equal mechatronics. Which is ridiculous, because you cannot put Systems Design as a subset of another program by its very definition. This doesn't mean its 'better' -> but its exactly what the mecha's are asserting about themselves! When we say different engineering disciplines are a subset of Systems is because that IS the defintion of the program: designing inter-disciplinary engineering systems that take into consideration long-term social, environmental and economic effects. Basically, they aren't designed in isolation.

Social Engineering.

Systems is a pervasive design methodology that exists no matter what new technology becomes the paradigm: wireless, nanotech, artificial intelligence, biomed or space
This doesn't imply we are better than Chems, Comps, Elecs or the new nano-tech. SyDe students thrive off of better students in other disciplines because our work is managing, planning or designing the interactions, processes and products of different engineering teams. SyDe is necessary to occur anywhere you have a hodgepodge of different engineers working on a large-scaled project, mixed with accountants, managers, government officials and concerns such as environment, ergonomics, social development etc. That is why we need to promote systems so we keep getting quality undergrads, because society needs to progress from specialized optimization to inter-specialization optimization. SyDe is good for society.

The main hurdle is our image or lack of among high school students. As UW's former poster child, we won't be getting much attention from the UW admin i suppose as resources are put towards Nanotech. Obviously, it is the next paradigm shifting concept and deserves any universities resources if they plan on being a leader in innovation and engineering. Our focus should not be on why we are 'better' than any other program but why we are different. Especially why we are different from Computers or a (Computer) Systems Analyst. Its up to the current batch of students to promote syde in their communities and high school. We have to show students that there is a creative, open-ended and diverse engineering option that doesn't limit you to one way of thinking, one way of engineering....without being generalistic. Systems is not a general education on all engineering but a structured method of designing interacting sub-systems. Its another matter that the faculty could be doing a better job and i don't like their present direction with the new 1b's (unofficially G-sys).

Every engineering discipline has a 'type' of student that usually applies to it. We (class of 08sys) have to make sure that the syde-type students are making an educated decision when applying to Waterloo engineering and aren't just trying to ride any "nanotech" wave or get disuaded by the mystery around syde.

is

2005-01-30T01:17:00.000-05:00

we are but metaphors in the mind of God
alluding to something it itself cannot contain
that it itself cannot explain
abstractness is an understatement
for it strives towards a concept
which has no symbols
we are but metaphors of a thought
:flailing:
in between meaning and knowing
for knowledge doesn't exist but then why does existence?
a wisp of being living within imagination we are
impermanence or not, such things are foolish
meaning never was possessed by its owner
an illusion contained for restless minds
for reason and understanding are self-contained
repetitive, recursive, self-satisfying
nonsense, sense or no sense - an axiom
mingled within mysteries is some truth
to some question that cannot be thought of
or that cannot be dealt with
:helpless:
the circle is prisoner to itself
aching to break free or struggling to vanish
everything or nothing
does distinction have any value left?
an assertion to itself
the circle remains in an eternal embrace
of itself or of what it can't be
isn't it all the same?
for the circle, the shape, the mind, the I
what purpose is served
by the distinction it cannot deny
the conflict within, outside or pervading throughout
and yet
a gentle motion contained in a moment
provides the thesis towards
a beautiful symphony
the tune delights within an immaterial realm
subtle quantities of epiphany, enlightenment
traverse the spectrum of ignorant and omniscient
a distinction created
what motion does my circle have?
:intrinsic:
the differences multiply
words and symbols comply
our thoughts, our minds cannot escape
such innate designs
where would they escape to?
to grasp the complexity of a subject
explicitly divergent from itself
given that both form the system equivalently
to be ignorant and omniscient
how is that achieved?
are our definitions the creation of discord and harmony
and reality
:dynamic:
changing to satisfy every entity's perception
we are but flares of a thoughtless pursuit
forgotten or not; we shouldn't be remembered
would we want to remember ourselves?
discord, disunited, a few with hope
hope for what?
for a cohesion of divergence!
beckoning the end of consciousness, the end of our reality it is
a new one begins, doesn't, is, isn't
doesn't really matter
we are what is

giggidy-giggidy-giggidy

2005-01-20T22:49:00.000-05:00

hey hey! finally i can muster up enough motivation to post something! and i want to change this world...pffff. Go find a new ruler..oh people of earth, i am not worthy. Leave me to my hypothetical mangoes.

So i decided to miss a few days of school to attend the Canadian Undergraduate Technology Conference. the first day was quite fun...the IBM workshop wasn't too good (in nerd language: it was like O(n^n) ).. altho i liked the open-source Eclipse tool they were teaching us....i was way to sleepy and i was bitter from not getting the Alias 3-D animation workshop. *shakes fist*

The keynote speeches were from a RIM and then a Bell guy. Both where quite interesting. RIM spoke about the constraints of wireless tech and how it will move forward...Bell was more about the future merging of wireless broadband and digitization of society..and how everything will change significantlly due to innovation in these industries.

Then there was a speaker on Autonomous Computing (IBM). Interesting concept, especially a chip that can burn circuits ON THE FLY depending on the environment. Amazing. The presentation was a little dry, should've made it more flashy for us people who like shiny things.

There was a talk show format event called TechShow. By far the funnest part of the day. A Microsoft guy came and showed us new n cool gadgets. No IPOD ofcourse. Michael Furdyk gave us a motivational speech (see: www.talkingITglobal.com). I loved the part where he said "Oprah is mean". I think i'll be an entrepreneur ....it would be nice to have creative control and the flexibility to take on projects the interest me..and actually make a measureable difference.

The next couple of days were awesome as well. Learnt about nanotech, renewable energy, efficient housing..mingled with employees of Microsoft, RIM, Business Objects, Redknee, Nortel among other hi-tech companies. Amazon and WhiteHat gave the remaining keynote speeches..both quite insightful.

The good thing about CUTC was that I got a better understanding of what Systems Design is all about. Its about being the broker of an interdisciplinary team working on a project..its about bringing a whole world optimization to a group that has isolated individuals making small optimizations.

blog-delay

2005-01-10T21:44:00.000-05:00

new posts will be comin shortly..as soon as i settle into my university schedule..and catchup to all the assignments and miscellenia

oh..must watch this!! Sarah MacLaughlan inspired by Engineers Without Borders: www.worldonfire.ca

oh so homer...

2004-12-21T22:06:00.000-05:00

homer: "i'm sick of this tarzan movie!"

lisa: "daaaaad, its a documentary on the homeless!"

homer: "oh, right"

a short history of progress

2004-12-18T23:45:00.000-05:00

Each time history repeats itself, so it's said, the price goes up

a short history of progress

seems interesting enuf for me to buy after i read the half dozen books on my shelf..

loon merry boom / moon berry bloom

2004-12-04T22:31:00.000-05:00

Loon merry boom
Moon berry bloom

I can't stick to the way I see this world
I move I change,
Like a chameleon feels this world

I need to find a reason to die
Before I learn why I live alone

I can't stick to the way I think
I wander I ponder
Like autumns leaves change out of tune

I need to find a way to heal this world
Before I learn how to heal my soul

Moon berry bloom
Loon merry boom

thinking again

2004-11-25T19:27:00.000-05:00

Ah, the drive home is so gloomy. Dark skies, hypnotic driving at 60...then 20...then 0..then 120 all of sudden. Damn hiways, so inconsistent.

So when i'm not sleeping while driving and not trying to find a decent radio station ..i think. Today i was thinking about how our society would achieve a new high once education would become free. Some countries, i think sweden, already have free higher education. That's quite awesome. I don't care if taxes are used to pay for education, but if education is not directly payed for, and is "free", that would be a great improvement in society. Simply because the taxes can atleast spread the load, and that does not include the vast (hopefully) improvement in the social structure with more people not limited to what they can learn, what skills they can pick up ... greatly improving economy. There would also be an influx of intelligent and motivated people from other countries, attracted by the learning prospects. Not that Canada needs to bait people to come here.

Anywho, free education would be good.

e-mail: random thoughts

2004-11-17T17:59:00.000-05:00

From: Taneem Talukdar

I watched a documentary on the Chechen life under Russian occupation.
I dunno ... I am overly sensitive to these things sometimes ... but I was just shaken to the core by watching the brutality with which the russians conduct business.

They make random raids into civilian homes, capture mothers in front of their children. Then, they are tortured (and assuredly raped) and then killed and beheaded.

And it gets better. Families have to bribe the Russian soldiers upto $4000 dollars just to get the body back for a decent burial.

This has gone on for ten years.

Ten years! This is not the heat of war. These are soldiers, who have time to premeditate their actions. Who then go back home, to families of their own. Don't they dream? Don't they have nightmares? Don't they remember what they have done?

16 year olds arrested and tortured with electricity. Innocent shopkeepers arrested, stripped naked, blindfolded and kept in a well in total darkness and subzero temperatures for a month, with occasionaly breaks to be strung up and beaten and punched with barbed wire.

"Why don't they kill us all with an atomic bomb?" a woman wails "Why do they make us suffer so"

What is the depth of humanity's pitch black darkness? No animal would ever intentionally make another suffer. Why is it that in human beings we find this tendency to against everything that we symbolize - are we damned by our very nature?
Torture - a concept that makes me cold. Did you know that during the
spanish inquisition, one method of killing a person was to cut a small hole in their abdomen, and then slowly string out the guts of the person, prolonging the death for hours keeping the victim alive? How blind, how twisted, how base do you have to be to not be affected by the raw human suffering of such an act?

And yet even in this, what amazes me is that the Chechens are defiant. Their birth rate is exploding. The sheer determination, to work against conditions that are just brutal - the soldiers, the cold, no electricity, no real shops, losing your family members everyday, no real hospital, ambulances that are shot at by the army... it makes me wonder, that if I had that raw courage and fever for living, I could change the world with the resources I am lucky to have!

Bah just rambling. I hate how easily I get affected by these things.

-taneem

Yea, its quite shocking to realize we share 99.99999% of our DNA with such groups of individuals. Well, we also share a good deal with pigs..maybe there's a connection. Ofcourse, the ppl they commit crimes against are simply 'terrorists' so its ok to do anything to there people.
pfff..whatever. There's a quote in the Qu'ran when paraphrased says "Oppression is worse than slaughter" .. which echoes that woman's mentality.

I dont know what kind of ppl these soldiers have been brainwashes into becoming. I've told u about how in Africa, one of those places with civil unrest and gang-lords, they breeded young children to become heartless warriors by making them kill their parents and at times there entire tribe. After that, nothing would affect the heart. But these russians aren't living in a tribal war zone with poverty..but a developed country. and as u said..with families and homes and prolly 1.5 cars...going to watch the game on t.v. on sunday nites..having dinner in a restaurant.

yea..i dont understand it. i think what happens is...that the 'body' takes over from the mind and the emotional side. ofcourse..everything occurs in the brain..but i'm trying to distinguish between different concepts. there are different facets of the brain: emotional (the heart)...rational/logic..instinctual...and then a fourth...is i would coin 'artifical'. everybody has soem degree of artificially created biases (i.e. biases filter decision making results). i would say this artificial aspect is a mixture of social emotions and logic that become implanted in the mind.
The original emotion and logic are the natural disposition of a person..which religion would recognize as initially "good" or in a pure state. So those are always there. Now if our artificial mind is in harmony with our original mind..then there is peace (with the assertion that "idea
of peace" comes as a result of society's common leaning towards an inner disposition which is shared by every human in face of the conflicting artificial dispositions across societies).

If not peace, then there is conflict..inside and outside. In those russian soliders (and other similar ppl)..the artificial mind has displaced the original mind to a great degree...i.e. like a software update that leaves the core intact but adds new defintions and rules. but if the rules become vastly different..the function of the software changes from a word processor to photoshop

to top all of this..another thing that happens is that humans have an ability to interchange different personalities, often consciously . For example, your never the same person, you become different depending on WHO u are interacting with. You can be shy with one person but charismatic infront of another person. Take this to another level..u can be compassionate to
someone (or some category of ppl)..yet commit an injustice towards another. It is normal to a degree but the more disjointed and unconsistent u become ... one aspect of u will take a life of their own..and its actions would not be held responsible the moral rules of the other aspect. Basically..work Joe and home Joe are the same person..yet if they become completely
disjointed..then at work..Joe is functioning on one set of morality (let's
say the original mind)..while home Joe is on another (the artificial mind).
Its an inconsistent person: home Joe's possibly compassionate, friendly, philanthropist nature would not be transferrable to the ruthless, backstabbing and selfish work Joe. And Joe would take these roles as routine and habit..and there would be no guiding line left..but just a morality that is based on the variables of place or social interactions. Most ppl would be conscious about this change in character...and i suspect..would have an inner cringe that something is wrong, yet they or society would be too steeped into a mindset that it would be difficult to change. Let's call this concept the "Inertia of Society". However, if it is like inertia...then we can assume that with increasing 'steepness' into a conflicting idealogy would eventually reach a moving point..where inertia changes into velocity..and society would be changed. The pressure of the conflicting
force, altho sustained for a while, will eventually cause an opposite reaction.

Recognize that its not wrong to have different personal interactions as thats impossible to make urself act with one personality..the inconsistency of morality is what creates a problem as one side does not hold any upperhand over another..i.e. guilt may not arise (Keep in mind im alluding to ur reference of home russian soldier and at work russian soldier)

Ofcourse..i dont mean to imply that it is good to be consistently ruthless on all levels/personalities either

yea..i never thuoght about this ...but guess i have a lot to say .lol..

fahd

The Last Emperor

2004-11-15T21:59:00.000-05:00

Last week, browsing thru blockbuster, i happened to see the cover of this movie "The Last Emperor"..with a little chinese kid on the front.

I had never heard of this movie, but the title seemed intruiging and ofcourse, a little kid being emporer was too good to pass. Anyways, the back of the cover said it had won 9 academy awards including Best Picture and Best Director back in 88!! For a movie i had never heard of, that's quite good.

So i rented it and i've been watching it (its more than 3 hours). I must say the awards were well deserved. It shows the life of the last emperor of China during the transition to becoming a communist republic. I recommend this movie to those who like watching long serious movies that actually have a point (i.e. anything that Scary Movie isn't).

In one seen neer the end, it shows clips of Japanese attacking China (Manchuria and then southern places)..which was one of the first civilian attacks..during WWII and then America dropping the two big nukes. Clearly illustrating that on both sides, it was really the innocent civilians that were being ruthlessly played in these political power games. Even if america's attack was necessary to stop a brutal evil..it really affected the families and kids ..and obviously future generations. But what is acceptable in order to stop a greater evil?

Yay Camera

2004-11-15T21:54:00.000-05:00

So I got my new digi cam a couple weeks back. Been happy snapping random photos and at events. Just go to my imagestation to view the pics.

BoM: Chapter 1: Awakening (cont'd)

2004-11-10T22:18:00.000-05:00

v
--

Towards the door, moving in pain
Wanting to remain within
Within the wooden sanctuary
Within dream and mind
The inevitability of the reunion from separation
Of returning outside one's thoughts
Burns hope into crusty crumbling charcoaled wood

vi
--

The door opens
Wind rages inside
Heat fills its hunger from the skin
The smoke searches for dark tunnels to traverse
The sanctuary must now be left

vii
--

The Earth seems to quiver
As the foot rests on it
Its nervous, beaten, hurt, sad
Afraid. Horrified
Poor humble witness
Of our delirious crimes

BoM: Chapter 1 - Awakening (cont'd)

2004-10-27T22:32:00.000-04:00

iii
--

The neglected soul lifts the body from the bed
For the importance of the journey does not escape it

Step and step of burdened feet
Come closer to the window sill

The Earth outside shows birth pains
Devouring itself mercilessly

The brown red dusty hues abound
Green is but a fantasy

iv
--

Agony's residue enters within
As eyes regain sight of man's horrendous sin

Tear drops rescue dirt
From the rocky face's aged cracks

Destruction. Chaos. Within and Outside
A metaphor to each other
Life imploded
The journey must begin

Book of Moments: Chapter 1 - Awakening

2004-10-26T19:58:00.000-04:00

i
--
A dream begins a journey
An epiphany in making

The dream merges to awakening
Like the exchange of the two twirling Orbs
Dream upon dream, gazing within

The harsh reminder is but the innocence
The innocence of this place to be broken;
To be broken by the thought of the journey

ii
--

The dusted winds bring forth a dry sting
Face withering, living, animated as a sandstorm

The turmoil of past; just a beginning
A preparation of the journey

Eyes burning; throat crackling
Forgotten words couldn't be spoken:
The lips are sealed; breath is concealed

Humour

2004-10-25T19:47:00.000-04:00

I was wondering. The difference between humans and anything else, can come down to the ability to recognize humour. This ability is quite linked to our creative abilities. Not just to be humourous but to actually recognize a joke/sarcasm/pun and respond to it. It would be to our credit if we can aritifically create an interface that has the ability to recognize and respond to humour..and be aware of what that actually means.

mm...think ill go have some choco krispies....

Doggies

2004-10-24T23:39:00.000-04:00

Just watching Discovery channel's Daily Planet. Awesome show. Yes, a bit nerdy, but quite interesting. Today's show was about how humans have influenced the genetic makeup (evolutionarily) of dogs and other domesticated animals (like goats) . For example, a dog has certain cognitive abilities with relations to humans that helps it survive better. It understands when a person is not paying attention to them (if their eyes are closed or distracted) while a chimpanzee would not notice the difference. Also, they understand what it means when a human points towards something.

anywho..nothing too shocking....something we could have guessed anyways..but noooo..they need people to research these things.

Linguistic

2004-10-19T17:46:00.000-04:00

Urdu: Khushboo

Khush = happy

boo = smell

Hence,

Engish: Happy-smell

Rainbows keep falling on my head

2004-10-17T01:30:00.000-04:00

As i parked my car infront of the building, the dark cloudy skies had this, what i call "ironic", brightness to them. It was brilliantly beautiful. Looking at the clouds, it seemed sad that people would use them as a metaphor for dark, dreary and tragic times.

Today I was parked infront of Merriam's, the music school, for my classical guitar lessons. Guitar in hand, i look up at the sky as i got out of the car. I see this even more wonderous sight: an arching rainbow, almost painted on the skyscape. Did u know rainbows come in pairs? Another rainbow..more transparent..and with an opposite color spectrum made a sweeping arc above the first one. Light is darker inside the first semi-circle..and lighter outside. I think i got that right. I got distracted from the rainbows, however. U know what can distract a person from a rainbow? The sight of people stopping, coming outside of buildings..and just looking up at the sky. And then ur eyes meet, and a smile is passed..without any words being spoken. You know what the other is looking at. You know its different, its special, its awe-striking, humbling.....its simply wonderful.

What would a rainbow be, if there was no one to appreciate it?

D/C

2004-10-07T20:15:00.000-04:00

Just been thinking. We humans don't like doubt. Whenever we are in a "state of doubt"; we feel incomplete, down and sometimes depressed. Its self-defeating. Even if it is necessary to approach truth.

Certainity. The opposite. We thrive on it. Love is certainity. Knowledge is certainity. Faith is certainity. Certainity uplifts us and leads to happiness (not implying its a root cause or anything). I don't mean to say, that the love, the knowledge or the faith are "true".

Truth isn't what makes us happy, its our belief in the certainity of the "truth". We are more comfortable believing in the certainity of 1 + 1 = 2, than doubting it.

Why does organized matter that is self-aware like certainity when its make-up completely opposes it (in the form of particles; Quantum physics)?

Believing in certainity of something we know might possibly be inconsistent from what we make it; but refuse to acknowledge the possiblity or even be aware of it at times! There's a word for that, written in a novel 50 or so years ago: Doublethink (1984)

i like hidden and double meanings. Its so dastardly.

Elusive

2004-09-28T21:49:00.000-04:00

Prologue
=======

Careful step a steep decline
Jagged edges provide no rhyme
Destruction hasn't a form Divine
Mirrored mockery intertwined
Within each passages bickering lines

Passage 1
========

This solitude marches slowly
Marks it path among the lowly
The distance grows
A home not found
Lost it remains in the precipitous climb
Over conscience's hills within

Withered flowers burn ablaze
Testify the end with their remains
The pain grows
No comfort found
In the jungle lies the guiding gate
Under heart's molten hidden core

Passage 2
========

The voices call from within
Defeat! craves the chant
Dispute refrains from claiming hope
Injures, maims, the dejected dope

Nothing remains but a shallow core
Wobbling on the burning, hollowed floor
Sickness spreads; light folds
Essence rhymes jibberish crimes

Passage 3
========

Ocean waves suspended
Confusion spins winds unseen
Forgetten: the youthful dreams

Thoughts betray
The beauty of the silent frozen sky
Instilled: words, like a candle's last breath

Passage 4
========

Fickle knowledge barters time
Freedom lives like a silent passionate mime

Night and day put on their tragic play
Starring light's odyssey into darkness

Passage 5
========

Worship's end

Denial's friend

Epilogue
========

Abstract thoughts provide nothing
Insight lacks the elusive meaning

Disco Floor Interaction Design

2004-09-24T20:15:00.000-04:00

Hey yo blogworld readers..

check this out..its weally weally cool:

Disco Floor

Faith, Actions, Salvation

2004-09-21T21:56:00.000-04:00

My friends from highschool and I have an e-mail discussion group about philosophy, religion, morality and everything else that peaks our interest.

Here is a part of the most recent discussion we've had (just the 2nd half of the discussion actually):

"....One thing that i was curious about is why we have to have faith to go along with actions to complete a person? Why can't good actions be done because of our good nature as human beings and the old addage,"do unto others as you would have them do unto you" If good actions are adopted by all then there's a betterment altogether. Why does faith have to get involved?

Rohit"

"hey guys,

sorry for the late reply. It is a really good question, and not
something that i can just pop up with a quick reply. I actually had to
think this time :P.

We have to remember in what context we are speaking about faith and
actions. We are talking about the idea of "salvation" from a religious
perspective (i.e. from God). If we take away that from the
conversation; then the idea of salvation, faith or actions becomes one
without cause, necessity or purpose. So when we ask why faith is
required, we must understand that the assumptions we are making is
that there is a belief in a higher power and a structured organization
within which one works to attain this ideal end known as salvation.

So we must start by asking what is salvation and what are we being
"salvated" from to know what role actions and faith or anything play
in this? Some common themes offered up by religions are this:
separation of humanity and divine and the struggle with inner self -
the ego. However, this is only one aspect of salvation. The aspect of
us being "saved" from something. The other facet of our salvation is
what we are gaining. An increased awareness, closeness and "union" (i
use the word not in its strictest sense) of the Divine;
overcoming/defeating our egoes (the stem of arrogance, hypocrisy and
all self-made evil); a newer human society based on individuals who
have "earned" the position to live within God's Light (yes..an
abstract religious term..but im sure most of u "get it").

So salvation is both a reward and a saving grace. Essentially (since
we are talking from a religious perspective), salvation is the goal of
life, and life being the vessel thru which we are tested to attain our
end (or new beginning). Religious morality is the structure within
which we are given an organized methodology to attain salvation.
The key thing here is that religion is an organized, large scale,
society-level method of attaining salvation. TOP-DOWN.
Spirituality is a personal, usually silent method of attaining
salvation. BOTTOM-UP.
Religion is in a simplified form: structured spirituality..for the
purpose of having a cohesive, harmonious, working system on a larger
scale. The "purpose of"...doesn't mean that it actually
happens..because there are extraneous elements.

Therefore, life is all about experiencing this very rare opportunity
of separation from God to eventually LEARN to come back to Him, to
grow as a sentient conscious being in understanding, knowledge,
compassion, humbeless etc.

An important aspect of this is the "coming back to God" part. This is
where faith comes in, because coming back to God encompasses
EVERYTHING. The actions that you commit may be motivated by any
reason. The motivations u have are ur end, ur goal...ur god. When some
deed is done, it may appear good or bad by certain societal
perspectives. But to God, these societal perspectives is not what
matters. Its what ur intentions and motivatations for commiting the
deed are and the consequences of each deed are in response to it. If a
person does something good for materialistic reasons, then that is his
end, that becomes his god..and his reward for that good would consist
of the material end. Similarly, an action commited to within the
broader concept of "closeness to God"..it is rewarded in like. Now
before Sina jumps on this...closeness to God is a phrase im using for
a bigger concept. It is because the language we are using is putting
God into a little box..as if its an isolated entity. The closeness to
God translates into closeness to everything. Not that God is
everything, but everything comes from/ is linked to God..it is
intrinsically related to GOD. So helping a poor person on the street,
improving the environment..achieves that closeness, because that
person is part of the structure of the universe where the Divine
presence is more approachable. By helping the poor, by helping the
enviroment; we are helping to create a better structure where the
Divine spark spreads. Hence the concept in Islam that worship is an
all-encompassing aspect of life..with prayer being a subset of it..not
IT. Faith is the "keystone" to having the proper intention and goal.
Without faith, you are susceptible to your intentions, motivations and
end being influenced by something that is only an illusory ideal.
Faith is like the inner sun of the human soul, and the actions are the
life that comes forth due to it and are sustained by the "sun". Faith
is the north star. It is essential..it is the BASE...but just having
faith without doing anything..withers away the "life" and takes away
the opportunity we have to achieve our collective goal as sentient
beings.

What im saying is that we should be "good" because every act of
goodness is a communion with the Divine....and everything is related
to it. Every opportunity to do "good" is purposely there as our test,
to see what our reaction will be ..and if we ever learn to do good for
the right reasons and stay away from the negative aspects of life.

You might say..why not be good for the sake of goodness? My reply is
that there is no such thing. There is no such thing as isolated and
absolute goodness without a Divine. And if there is a divine, then we
aren't doing things because they are good, but because everything
defined as good brings us (collectively) closer to the divine. We all
have this feeling of doing 'good' only because we are INCLINED towards
experiencing the divine..and that is most experienced when giving up
yourself. Its is my opinion, that any true act of goodness (by
ANYONE), devoid of any material intention, is at its simplest form the
natural inclination of humanity ....a withering of the ego/self to
reveal the action of the divine spark within everyone.

To let go of oneself...your ego..is to let go of the illusion that we
are separate from God..and to realize the immense closeness that is
and always has been there.

Sorry for the long reply. I know i didn't address ur question as "head
on" as u might have wanted me to.

Fahd"

FTP issues

2004-09-20T18:15:00.000-04:00

Hm. I moved some files around on my ftp client...and my blog pic was there..so it got moved. But now, my FTP client has expired and this free one that im using wants me to register to get a newer free version otherwise it wont let me use it! Dang..too bad im lazy. So right now my picture is a blank white space. Just FYI.

Love and Loyalty

2004-09-17T23:55:00.000-04:00

Just some thoughts in reply to a discussion I had with my friend Taneem, about loyalty and its connection to love (the discussion started with me talking about love in relation to a God and humanity or within humanity).

Loyalty is inherent to the concept love, but is not love.
Loyalty is an effect of love, but is not love. We can also use the term commitment.
So its an inherent effect, but is not the sole definer of love.
Essentially, i dont think its correct to state that love is or can be defined explicitly by loyalty.
People can be loyal to many things (nation, animals, ideologies, themselves, parents), but I don't think it would constitute being called "love" in all cases where loyalty is present. Love is more of an experiential concept than logical; one of those "things" difficult to encase in words.

The cause of love does not always stem from loyalty however, altho u may say it is the need for loyalty that drives people to love. Im not sure about that, but it may be motivation for some individuals, not all.

Do people love to gain someone's loyalty or to give their own to another person? Both cases happen and would depend on the individuals personality or needs. In the second case, loyalty is almost offered up as a gift, sometimes even unconditional to display the emotions the person holds within. In the first case, loyalty is the driving force behind the reason to find love. To find someone who will be loyal TO you.

We can look at another cause that is biological, however these reactions are not random, as love would occur without any reasonable connection that could be deductible by logic or pattern.

Which brings in the other likely reason that it is also stemmed in our intellectual interactions and is connected to the concept that we are self-aware.

We have the opportunity to experience love because of our awareness of self. Without that i don't think it would be possible.

Copy the Copy

2004-09-11T13:53:00.000-04:00

I've been wondering; has anyone copyrighted the copyright symbol?